Thursday, September 18, 2014

Perfect Love

Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love.

1 John 4:18 (NLT)

 

                Perfect love…  All of us grew up in homes with imperfect parents or guardians.  No matter who the adults in our life were, they were not perfect.  They all faced struggles and challenges themselves.  They were unable to demonstrate perfect love toward us.

               
                When we have only known imperfect love, we tend to have fear.  It is the cause and effect syndrome.  When I do something bad/wrong, something bad/punishment, harm, injury happens to me.   We learned this from childhood.  When we disobeyed we received discipline or punishment.  Over and over we tested the waters so to speak and over and over again received our just reward.  Due to the fact that they were imperfect, sometimes that discipline/punishment was server or harsh.  Sometimes it was not given out of love and concern for our wellbeing.  Because of this, we became fearful. 

                It is important to note that in our culture discipline and punishment tend to be used synonymously.  There is however a difference.   In an article by Chip Ingram1, Chip notes these differences:  Punishment is used to inflict penalty for an offense.  Its focus is on past misdeeds.  The attitude with which it is usually measured out is hostility and frustration on the part of the parent/giver.  The results of punishment are fear or guilt on the part of the receiver. 

               
                Discipline on the other hand is used to train for correction and maturity.  Its focus is on future correct acts.  The manner in which it is given is with love and concern on the part of the parent/giver.  The result of discipline is security on the part of the receiver.  While discipline sometimes comes with consequences, these are measured out in a loving manner by a parent who has already worked through the issue with the child.  The consequences are not then seen as punishment but as gentle reminders to guide future actions and behavior. 
               
                Another issue is the conditions on the love we received.  Some of us may have grown up in homes that were totally unloving, others in homes where love was contingent on our behavior or performance.  Still others had loving homes where we knew we were loved no matter how we behaved.  In each of these homes unconditional love was still imperfect at best.

               
                1 John 4:16 tells us, “So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. 1 John 4:18 says that perfect love casts out fear.”  Let’s follow this out: if God is love, and he abides in us, and perfect love abides in us, then that love will cast out all fear. 

 
                For the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes each one he accepts as his child.”  Hebrews 12:6 (NLT)  “My son, do not despise the Lord's discipline and do not resent his rebuke, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.”  Proverbs 3:11-12 (NIV) “Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”  Hebrews 12:9-11 (NIV) While we may need disciplined by our heavenly Father, if we understand God’s love, we will accept His discipline and not live in fear of it.  We will learn from it and make future decisions based on our new knowledge.
 
                If we understand how much God loves us, “For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16, we will not fear anything that comes our way.  When we realize that God has only our good in mind when He allows the trails and circumstances that come into our lives, we will also realize that He has it covered and will provide whatever we need to face each one.  “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”  Jeremiah 29:11 (NLT) “And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:19.
 
                Father, I ask you to show each of us your perfect love.  Let us rest in that love so that when we face trials and struggles we will have no fear because your perfect love, which dwells in us, will cast out all fear.  Thank you for your discipline which is always for our good and which is accompanied by your strength, resources, and wisdom to apply it to our lives. 

 

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